Do You Banian Yourself?

"Why do you guys have to wear a banian?" a friend asked me once indignantly.

Why indeed, for a moment I was semi-perplexed myself. She further added, "I'm sure just because we girls wear bras, youguys just had to have your equivalent."

I was momentarily stunned. Was that a bitter jibe or a cruel suspicion? Should I laugh and share the joke or should I denythe charge? I did not know what to do.

"WHAT!!" was all I said, dumbfounded by this preposterous assumption, this vile accusation.

"I can understand you wearing underwears of course, but I could never understand banians……" she went on, by then I had tuned off, thinking of me, myself and my banians wondering why I wear them. I had never been this nonplussed before by such an inane matter. I used to simply fit into one before wearing my shirt, like an ingrained involuntary action, without even thinking the whys of it all.

---------------------------Why banians?---------------------------
As I thought I realized immediately that banians did give a warm comforting feeling, that I missed on the days I went without them. Moreover some shirt materials do not feel really good touching the skin, so again a banian helps. Also, the shirt of sheer material falls better on a banianed body. Banians also give an extent of fullness to a scrawny body. However one must not wear a banian under a very see-through shirt. The only people who do that are Chiman Kalia, Pappu Kangee and IqbalHatella. (Know them?)

For the guys who sweat profusely banians helpget rid of that wet feeling, or that wet look. Even those who don'tsweat a lot feel an icky enveloping dampness without a banian.Banians help cover the sweaty patch that is otherwise seen under thearms (very noticeable otherwise on Nanda, and Moushmi Chatterji. Ithink you know them).

--------------What I do not like about banians-----------

Since I prefer to wear banians with sleeves, I hate it when `Sunday is longer than Monday' Allow me to elaborate on that. When you are wearing a half sleeved shirt or T shirt, under which you have worn a sleeved banian and the sleeve of the banian creeps out of the shirt sleeve…….I'm sure manymight have noticed or experienced it. I dislike that entire exercise of continuously tucking that running banian sleeve into the shirt-sleeve. I discussed this grave matter once with my friend Kalpesh and he smugly said, "That never happens tome as I have large biceps which you don't have. Why don't you workharder in the gym like I do?" Kalpesh incidentally is one of those guys who can afford to kill themselves in a gym three hours a day. His daddy has a flourishing construction business, thats why. Baap builder,beta body builder.

I also dislike hole-formations in banians. Somehow happens to thebest of them, perforated after prolonged use. This means its time toget new ones. Another sight that is not very nice to see early in the morning whilegetting dressed is discolorations on my banians. I like them to remain white, virginal, unstained and unblemished. Let's not get intodetails of why banians get stained/blemished, let's just say itsplain unpleasant. Banians hide the cuts in a body which has a well-defined musculature,hence are not to be favoured when you want to show off your physique.Banians could also cause in hindrance in sex. Maybe not always,sometimes they could add to the fun in their own clumsy way.

Hmmm... pretty analytical here!!